Tuesday, February 11th, 2003
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10:25 pm - Awesome
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Well, It has been a while sine I wrote in this journal. I'm working a lot! I mean like 60 hours! I know I'm crazy... but what is more crazy is that I take 18 hours at school. Oh well, thats life! I must say that God is really awesome. I was leading worship at St. Lukes United Methodist Church and have been praying for a while that God would send me a church that is looking for a New Worship Leader. Well, I am now the head Worship and Praise Minister for Cokesbury United Methodist Church! I'm so excited that I get to lead people in corporate worship before the throne of Grace. Well ,I must depart into Theory II Land and do my homework.
John
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Tuesday, January 21st, 2003
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12:08 am
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Monday, January 20th, 2003
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11:56 pm - "What color Eyes Do You Have?"
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11:47 pm - He is Holy
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About two and a half months ago, my mom was diagnosed with a very deadly cancer and she was given 2 months to live. After that, we all got on our knees and started crying out to the very one who holds life and death in his hand... I have awesome news... The tumors are decreasing in size!!!!! Praise be to my Father!!! My Lord... My Blessed Savior!!! Praise the Lord of Hosts!!!! Jesus is so so so Good!!!
John
current mood: happy
current music: Kirk Franklin - "Our God is an Awesome God!!!!"
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Friday, January 10th, 2003
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3:59 pm - What a Day
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Today has been a pretty good day... I actually slept for a long time... It felt great cause I haven't slept in like 2 days cause of my mom... Today was the first day that I saw my dad break down and cry... Its really hard on him... I just am praying for a miracle...
School Starts Monday... EWWW!! LOL oh Well, Tiffany Leaves today :( I'm going to miss her but she'll be back in like 2 wks... she just doesn't know it yet...
John
current mood: crazy
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Thursday, January 9th, 2003
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3:26 am - The Length of Life
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Wow, yesterday was a day that no one would want to hear the words... Enjoy your life... My mom had her appointment with M.D. Anderson and they told her that there is no cure and that she should love her life and enjoy it while it lasts... I'm her son, that is my mother. I just cannot bear the thought of loosing my mother... God has been so good to me, and I am just amazed at how young he is wanting to take her home... She is only 48 and I'm 19... I still need my mother. She is my BEST FRIEND. I just want to know why now, and not later? I just pray that with each passing day, that God would direct me in my path and give me the strength to get through it all... Count your blessings name them one by one...
Love,
John
current mood: hopeful
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Tuesday, January 7th, 2003
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4:18 am - Questions For God
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God,
So often we just want to fall into your presence and just say that we love you. I just often sit and just cry because I know how good you have been to me. I don't understand your love - that you loved me so much that you were willing to sacrifice your life just for me... I still to this day just stand amazed at the fact that you love me... I pray that you oh God would delight yourself in my praise, that you would allow my words to place you high and lifted up in this place. You oh God are worthy and forever praised. I know Father that I have fallen from your grace. I know that my love could never amount to your love, but I hope that you will let me love you with all that I am. Father, I live for you and I want you to know that you are so Holy and I know that you have everything in your hands...
My mother has Cancer... I found out about it two years ago... She was diagnosed with it and then they said they "got it all" Well, recently about two months ago... it reoccurred... I know that God is sovereign but I can't help to just think that God could be getting ready to take her... It's a cancer that’s very, very, very rare. Only 2% of people get it... It latches on the Jaw and spreads very rapidly... She has an appointment today at 8am at M.D. Anderson Cancer Center... I just can't really comprehend that my mother has cancer... The woman that I love, my dearest and Best Friend has cancer. I am not mad at God, and I know that his will surpasses all and I know that he will take care of his Kids... He loves us and I know that it will be ok, and that If she passes from this earth, that I will REJOICE, and if she lives I will REJOICE...
I just can't picture my life with out her. God gave me a family that is just so amazing and I daily stand amazed that My family loves one another so much. I just know that I am at peace and my dad and sister are too... I just pray that the Father would continue to show his glory in this situation and that maybe someone will come to know the Lord through it all.
"...To behold the glory of the LORD and to inquire in his temple." Ps. 27:4
current mood: confused
current music: MUSICMATCH Jukebox
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3:20 am - Holy
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So often in our lives we are bombarded by billboards, magazines, television shows that are not HOLY! Jesus said that we are to be holy... "As he is... so are we to be" I honestly believe that if we as his kids aren't holy, how can us Christians expect for the world to see Jesus in us... After all we are "To provide living proof, of a loving God to a watching world."
Love,
John
current mood: loved
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2:36 am - Today
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Well, Hey Everyone... I'm John. I live in Clear Lake City and I love the Lord. I acccepted Jesus as My Savior when I was 7 and I serve him with everthing that is in me... I had a pretty good day today... Recently I found out that my mother has cancer again... It's a Jawbone cancer that latches on and doesn't let go... I know that God can heal her if he so chooses and I have faith that he will... Well, I'll post more tomorrow...
Love,
John
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